w long is the longest dildo, and how short is the shortest dipstick?
We pit her favorite battery-operated toys with your seasoned manoy. Someone else has to decide who wins, though…
Scroll down below and find out who wins in a mano-a-mano between her dildo and your manoy!
DIMENSIONS
Dildo
Two things pretend-penises don’t cover in the length and girth departments: 1. They don’t have optional flaccid modes; 2. And—not counting dildos packaged as “first timer” toys (5.5 inches by 1.5 inches)—they don’t make them small. On average, they’re a clean 6 to 8 inches (excluding grip/suction base), and at their commercially-available longest, can run the stretch of 11.5 to 12 inches with 1.5- to 2.5-inch girths (long whilst unproportionally thin).
Penis
Infectious disease specialist Kent Sepkowitz, in an article called “The inexact science of penis measurement” for The Medical Examiner, writes the global average male’s manoy is at 3.5- to 4-inch flaccid, 5-inch “stretched flaccid,” and 5.5- to 6-inch, erect. An earlier study by Alfred Kinsey in the ’60s on self-reported measurements call it at a proud 6.5- to 7-inch, erect.
Trojan condoms, in their penis sizes lab project involving 11,000 participants of varied ethnic backgrounds in the last 50 years, measure the average male adult as: 3.4 to 3.7 inch flaccid, 5.1 to 5.7 inch erect, 3.5 to 3.9 inch thick/thin.
Point: Dildo
RUNTIME/JIGG-ABILITY
Dildo
Powered almost entirely by a pair of general purpose AA/AAA batteries per regular or mammoth toy (or a single AA/AAA battery for the smaller 5-incher sets)—1,700 mAh to 3,000mAh of its commuted battery power converts to up to 21 hours of vibrating activity. Or roughly 30 minutes at a time via its multiple-speed vibrations, every other day, for three weeks.
Penis
The adult male, meanwhile, according to Men’s Health Philippines, lasts an average of 5 to 10 minutes in the sack. Data from theendurancereport.com calls it at 2 to 6 minutes on average. But while 70 percent of the men surveyed in Men’s Health believed they can’t hold off the fireworks as long as they liked to, sex researcher Alfred Kinsey says being quick to the barilan isn’t a problem at all, but in fact, signals “masculine vigor.”
Point: Dildo
NEXT: Find out which tastes better!
TEXTURE
Dildo
Pimped with texturizing beads, bendy-ness, levels of firmness, softness, and even racial shades. Dildos can appear neon and android-like, but can also take on the appearance of a black or tisoy schlong. Silicones and jelly vibrators are closer in texture to breast implants than they are to actual skin. New material called lifelikes are clammier and pre-stickied. Glass and metal, the only dildo types that really need extra lubing—despite sounding like awkward choice materials -- are rare favorites for their uncharacteristic-of-sex-toy firmness, and ability to both warm up as they’re used, or retain refrigerated coolness.
Penis
Loose skin and creases on the shaft allow penises to “glide” efficiently in and out of mother ships. We say “gliding” over thrusting because biologists believe there’s a kind of graceful efficiency (when consensual) in the coordinated penile-vaginal rhumba, as all of our human parts were designed to fulfill their anatomical uses/purposes.
Point: Penis
TASTE/FLAVOR
Dildo
Should taste the way they smell: neutral plasticky, sometimes strawberry- or cherry-flavored depending on rare variants. Rare because vibrators aren’t so much conventionally made for licking than they are for self-insertion.
Penis
In the paraphrased words of one half of our columnist-duo, Jahziel Manabat: earthy, fruity, sometimes soapy “kapag conscious at nagsabon!” The bottom line still relying heavily on taste buds-and schlong compatibility: “…minsan bet mo, minsan hindi, pero pag love mo, love mo na rin yung lasa.”
Point: Penis
AINTENANCE/HYGIENE
Dildo
Xtoysphil owner Art Muñoz says it’s safe to use straight out of the box, but like other newly owned things, it’s best to wash before deploying. Soap and water are the only cleaning materials you need (see: soap on, soap off), but you’ll need to air/blow dry or wipe it off with a towel before slathering lubricant to keep the material new. Wash before storing and after every use, and don’t leave the batteries in if you’re storing it for more than a month so nothing leaks. Replace when there’s visible tears, or every two years regardless of how frequent/infrequent it’s used.
Penis
As long as you’re taking showers at least twice a week, the adult uncircumsized penis doesn’t really need its own specialized spot cleaning. Modestly hosing it down to lay off the post-urine taste is lady-appreciated. Vaginal mucus (the ladies’ natural lubes) disinfects penises of any, mostly harmless but smelly, microbes borne from the combination of hair follicles and your package being cooped up inside briefs/boxers.
Unlike female reproductive organs, the phallus is capable of reproducing sperm and making babies until the rest of his days (unless baog), its only challenge is in rising to the occasion, in which case prescription drugs are commercially available.
We pit her favorite battery-operated toys with your seasoned manoy. Someone else has to decide who wins, though…
Scroll down below and find out who wins in a mano-a-mano between her dildo and your manoy!
Dildo
Two things pretend-penises don’t cover in the length and girth departments: 1. They don’t have optional flaccid modes; 2. And—not counting dildos packaged as “first timer” toys (5.5 inches by 1.5 inches)—they don’t make them small. On average, they’re a clean 6 to 8 inches (excluding grip/suction base), and at their commercially-available longest, can run the stretch of 11.5 to 12 inches with 1.5- to 2.5-inch girths (long whilst unproportionally thin).
Penis
Infectious disease specialist Kent Sepkowitz, in an article called “The inexact science of penis measurement” for The Medical Examiner, writes the global average male’s manoy is at 3.5- to 4-inch flaccid, 5-inch “stretched flaccid,” and 5.5- to 6-inch, erect. An earlier study by Alfred Kinsey in the ’60s on self-reported measurements call it at a proud 6.5- to 7-inch, erect.
Trojan condoms, in their penis sizes lab project involving 11,000 participants of varied ethnic backgrounds in the last 50 years, measure the average male adult as: 3.4 to 3.7 inch flaccid, 5.1 to 5.7 inch erect, 3.5 to 3.9 inch thick/thin.
Point: Dildo
RUNTIME/JIGG-ABILITY
Dildo
Powered almost entirely by a pair of general purpose AA/AAA batteries per regular or mammoth toy (or a single AA/AAA battery for the smaller 5-incher sets)—1,700 mAh to 3,000mAh of its commuted battery power converts to up to 21 hours of vibrating activity. Or roughly 30 minutes at a time via its multiple-speed vibrations, every other day, for three weeks.
Penis
The adult male, meanwhile, according to Men’s Health Philippines, lasts an average of 5 to 10 minutes in the sack. Data from theendurancereport.com calls it at 2 to 6 minutes on average. But while 70 percent of the men surveyed in Men’s Health believed they can’t hold off the fireworks as long as they liked to, sex researcher Alfred Kinsey says being quick to the barilan isn’t a problem at all, but in fact, signals “masculine vigor.”
Point: Dildo
NEXT: Find out which tastes better!
Dildo
Pimped with texturizing beads, bendy-ness, levels of firmness, softness, and even racial shades. Dildos can appear neon and android-like, but can also take on the appearance of a black or tisoy schlong. Silicones and jelly vibrators are closer in texture to breast implants than they are to actual skin. New material called lifelikes are clammier and pre-stickied. Glass and metal, the only dildo types that really need extra lubing—despite sounding like awkward choice materials -- are rare favorites for their uncharacteristic-of-sex-toy firmness, and ability to both warm up as they’re used, or retain refrigerated coolness.
Penis
Loose skin and creases on the shaft allow penises to “glide” efficiently in and out of mother ships. We say “gliding” over thrusting because biologists believe there’s a kind of graceful efficiency (when consensual) in the coordinated penile-vaginal rhumba, as all of our human parts were designed to fulfill their anatomical uses/purposes.
Point: Penis
Dildo
Should taste the way they smell: neutral plasticky, sometimes strawberry- or cherry-flavored depending on rare variants. Rare because vibrators aren’t so much conventionally made for licking than they are for self-insertion.
Penis
In the paraphrased words of one half of our columnist-duo, Jahziel Manabat: earthy, fruity, sometimes soapy “kapag conscious at nagsabon!” The bottom line still relying heavily on taste buds-and schlong compatibility: “…minsan bet mo, minsan hindi, pero pag love mo, love mo na rin yung lasa.”
Point: Penis
Dildo
Xtoysphil owner Art Muñoz says it’s safe to use straight out of the box, but like other newly owned things, it’s best to wash before deploying. Soap and water are the only cleaning materials you need (see: soap on, soap off), but you’ll need to air/blow dry or wipe it off with a towel before slathering lubricant to keep the material new. Wash before storing and after every use, and don’t leave the batteries in if you’re storing it for more than a month so nothing leaks. Replace when there’s visible tears, or every two years regardless of how frequent/infrequent it’s used.
Penis
As long as you’re taking showers at least twice a week, the adult uncircumsized penis doesn’t really need its own specialized spot cleaning. Modestly hosing it down to lay off the post-urine taste is lady-appreciated. Vaginal mucus (the ladies’ natural lubes) disinfects penises of any, mostly harmless but smelly, microbes borne from the combination of hair follicles and your package being cooped up inside briefs/boxers.
Unlike female reproductive organs, the phallus is capable of reproducing sperm and making babies until the rest of his days (unless baog), its only challenge is in rising to the occasion, in which case prescription drugs are commercially available.
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